Peter Moore: How to climb Longs Peak

A supposedly fun hike I’ll never do again. And you probably shouldn’t, either.

Peter Moore: How to climb Longs Peak

It was the fall of 2020, and I had survived COVID, so I went looking for the next most dangerous thing I could think of: Climb Longs Peak!

I had been haunted by that prospect from since I moved to Colorado and took my car to the emissions testing facility in Fort Collins. I pulled into the bay and there it was, perfectly framed in the doorway: Longs freaking Peak!

It took me a full three years to summon the nerve, the skills, the gear, and oh yeah, the nerve, to tackle Longs. I made it up, and back, so now I’m an expert.

Here’s my step-by-step guide to climbing the highest peak in Rocky Mountain National Park. Or not.

Step 1: Google it

A cartoon quiz about Longs Peak
(Peter Moore, Special to The Colorado Sun)

Step 2: Build enthusiasm for your quest

A cartoon drawing of Longs Peak with a voice bubble saying
(Peter Moore, Special to The Colorado Sun)

Step 3: Recruit hiking buddies as if your life depends on it. Because it does.

A cartoon of a lineup of potential hiking pals, including a tourist, a biker, a beauty queen, an accountant and Sasquatch. A though bubble in the lower right says "Number five, please," selecting Sasquatch.
(Peter Moore, Special to The Colorado Sun)

Step 4: Stand on your roof for four hours with your toes hanging over the edge. The mountain is much scarier, but hey, it’s a start.

A cartoon drawing of a person's feet at the edge of a roof. There are two people below. One says
(Peter Moore, Special to The Colorado Sun)

Step 5: Select the right footwear.

A cartoon illustrating four types of footwear inappropriate for hiking -- flip flops, bunny slippers, high heeled, open toed biker boots and springed shoes.
(Peter Moore, Special to The Colorado Sun)

Step 6: Check the weather forecast. Often this will prevent you from doing something foolish, such as climbing Longs Peak.

A cartoon weather map showing threats of feet of snow and tornadoes in Rocky Mountain National Park at the same time
(Peter Moore, Special to The Colorado Sun)

Step 7: Gather trail intel from park rangers. 

A cartoon drawing of a park ranger suggesting "never" is a good time to climb Longs Peak
(Peter Moore, Special to The Colorado Sun)

 

Step 8: : Go to a Rockies game. You can see the top of Longs Peak, safely, from the upper deck. And you won’t want to look at the field, anyway